If there's one rule in life which every soap actor should never break, it's this: Never Go Back. Why? Because it's never as good the second time.
Of course, there are notable exceptions, but other than Dot Cotton in Eastenders and Harold Bishop in Neighbours, I'm struggling to think of any. The most amusing comeback was in Home and Away when Ailsa Fletcher, who had died several months previously, returned as a ghost in husband Alf's mind.
But such plots haven't (yet) made it into the 'not stretching it too far' genre which the British soap operas adhere to. As I said, yet.
Grant Mitchell's return to Eastenders generate massive hype, but only served to show that the actor Ross Kemp is much better at factual documentaries than he is at soaps (that's a compliment, big guy). Dirty Den's return to Walford ended with an unexpected extra showing on the web, so to speak. Nicky Platt on Corrie came back - and the ordeal seems to have turned the actor Adam Rickett into a Tory (he wants to be an MP now).
And while we're on the cobble, another great example is Bet Lynch. I have no idea why they brought Julie Goodyear back. Actually, I do - it's a quick way to get publicity and win ratings. And there is no doubt Julie's character did some of the best scenes of the 80s and early 90s. I can remember my parents roaring with laughter at the two-ways between her and put-upon husband Alec.
But I don't really remember what she did when she came back? Did she return from Spain or something (that bits sounds too realistic, my experience of the Costas is that Bet Lynch look a likes are ten to the dozen there).
And I certainly don't remember her being fired after returning. But maybe I wasn't that interested at the time.
It won't stop me watching You Can't Fire Me, I'm Famous (BBC 1, 10.35pm), the programme in which Piers Morgan shamelessly reminds us about his departure from the Mirror and uses it to relate to other stars who've had the axe.
The series feels as if it has been going on for ever, but that's not a bad thing in this case. And if Julie Goodyear was, indeed, fired after her return in 2002, then maybe it should be held up as an example in soap school that: COMEBACKS DON'T WORK!
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