Well, hands up who expected Sir Alan Sugar to follow on from telling Lee he was hired by saying to Claire: "And do you know what flower, so are you?"
All the way through the final minutes of the main show, and then during the spectacular spin off "You´re hired" (spectacular in that it was the second spin off show within an hour on the BBC following Sir Alan´s big announcement) I kept expecting Sir Alan to pull the rabbit out of the hat.
But it never came. He did promise Claire all the support and help she ever needs, but added that she won´t need it. Which is rather like offering someone a Ferrari and then noting that they don´t hold a driving licence. But hey, it´s the thought that counts.
However, what future for the people of Sir Alan´s corporation? Surely it is like watching your boss´s interview process, over 12 weeks. They know everything about Lee before he gets in. The lie on the CV, the dinosaur impressions, the dreadful team speeches, the list goes on.
I´ll say it again. How did he ever pick Lee over Claire? If the latest series of the Apprentice has taught us one thing, it´s that perhaps Sir Alan is losing his touch. The man who always seemed to make the right call (well, he got out of Spurs at the right time) has admitted firing people in the wrong order, and then when it came to the big decision - which of the final five to fire ahead of the final - he could only find one to bin off.
So we ended up with four people competing in what was quite a naff challenge. Market a perfume and impress people. I think most of us achieved that when we did Young Enterprise at school. Challenging, it was not.
But for Sir Alan is gave enough of an insight into his two teams - Claire and Lee v Alex and Helene - to send the latter two home. I was glad Alex had gone. The fact he kept reminding everyone he was 24 had really started to annoy. Not least because I´m over 24. I felt a bit more sorry for Helene. Her biggest crime appears to have worked for a big corporation and Sir Alan worried that the main skill for that was just to survive. Which he appears to have mastered over the years, wouldn´t you agree?
What interested me most was the way the losers throughout the series snatched at their chance to get back on the telly and be involved in the final. At one point, when Kevin - the rather wet ego from the West Country - seemed to think if he took control of the task, he´d become some sort of wild card and win.
But the absolute highlight was in You´re Fired, the first of the two spin offs. Adrian Chiles did what is always done on these shows, and dregged up some clip of a loser having a row. In Helene´s case, it was with Lucinda. Rather than just laugh it off, as Helene tried to do, Lucinda did her best to bring it all up again. This from the woman who always said you didn´t have to be a bitch in business. Lucinda´s obviously decided that it helps, though. Unlike her dreadful pink berets. A gob is a gob, regardless of hat.
And so the appeal goes out for The Apprentice 2009. My appeal would be: More interesting challenges (enough of the friends, Sir Alan) and more interesting contestants. With at least one who doesn´t begin each sentence with the word "I".
I thank you.
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